The last word: Bizarro World is alive and well in Sacramento 

If you read “Superman” comics as a kid—or even as an adult, now that the comic book has evolved into the more respectable “graphic novel”—you will probably remember “Bizarro World,” also known as “Htrae.” (In case you didn’t notice, that’s “Earth” spelled backwards; those old comic writers were nothing if not subtle.) Even those who’ve generally avoided comic book characters might remember “The Bizarro Jerry,” an episode of the “Seinfeld” situation comedy where the show’s characters were all confronted with their Bizarro counterparts.

If you neither read Superman comics nor watched “Seinfeld,” let me tell you a little bit about Bizarro World. On Bizarro World, everything is the opposite of its earthly analog. Instead of being round, the planet is a cube, and its denizens conduct their lives by the following code:

Us do opposite of all Earthly things!

Us hate beauty!

Us love ugliness!

Is big crime to make anything perfect on Bizarro World!

I don’t know when you Earthlings are reading this column, but it was written in mid-May, when California’s current leaders and those who seek to support or supplant them in Sacramento appeared to be inextricably ensnared in Bizarro World. To wit: Governor Schwarzenegger had just released the “May Revise” to the 2010–11 state budget he’d proposed in January; the June 8 primary election to choose the Republican candidate to succeed Schwarzenegger was still three weeks away; and a familiar face was biding his time on the Democratic side of the gubernatorial ledger, waiting for a winner to emerge from what had turned into the Republican equivalent of a steel-cage wrestling match.

Statements made and stances taken in both the budget process and the primary campaign got me thinking about Bizarro World. For example:

• Governor Schwarzenegger declared in January, upon the release of his proposed 2010–11 budget, “Our state, our economy, our future is so dependent on education … we must protect education.” Reviewing the proposal, though, it became apparent that the budget once again manipulated the numbers, and in fact it reduced education funding by $900 million in the current year and an additional $2.4 billion in 2010–11. In other words, the governor was clearly making a Bizarro World statement.
• Gubernatorial candidate Meg Whitman’s plan to “fix education” rests on her theory that 60 percent of total school funding gets to the classroom and the remaining 40 percent is for “bureaucracy and overhead.” That characterization is patently false, as CSBA’s own Rick Pratt laid out in “Fast Facts: Public Schools Do Not Spend 40 Percent on Overhead” (www.csba.org/schools.aspx). In fact, just 5 percent of the average school district budget goes to “general administration.” Bizarro? Bingo!
• Lest anyone think that I only pick on Republicans, I would simply point out that the theme of Democrat Jerry Brown’s gubernatorial campaign—“An Insider’s Knowledge, An Outsider’s Mind”—sounds like it came straight out of Bizarro World. And don’t get me started—I could fill this page with the names of Democratic lawmakers who have assured their constituents back home that education is their top priority, only to vote for budgets that gouge education funding once they’re safely ensconced at the Capitol. Quite clearly, more Bizarro behavior.

It saddens me to say it, particularly since nearly all of our great CSBA staff lives in or around Sacramento, but there seems little doubt that our capital city has become the 21st century version of Bizarro World. And while the point of this column is to make light of the situation, in fact this is deadly serious business. Unless and until our state leaders begin speaking honestly and forthrightly to their constituents (something I see precious little of these days), we are all doomed to live in Bizarro World. 

Frank Pugh is president of the California School Boards Association.